The Power of Touch

Over the past few years I’ve searched for ways to reach my mother. The further into Alzheimer’s that she slips, the more difficult it is to engage with her on any level. I reach her most expeditiously through the power of touch. She can be asleep or just distant and nothing else works except touch. I can get right down close to her and speak slowly and clearly. There are times when she hears my voice and responds by opening her eyes or smiling. But I’ve found that she responds more fully to me putting my arm around her and holding her close. She feels me there even if I don’t speak. I always rub her arm and hand gently, maybe put my hand on her knee, and I lean in and kiss her cheek. Through the many phases of Alzheimer’s disease I’ve always expressed love for and to my mother by hugging her and holding her hand.

Too often we underestimate the power of touch.

~Leo Buscaglia

So I think that touch, of all the senses, is most powerful for communicating with an Alzheimer’s patient. I’ve even seen the effect when I greet other residents in the memory unit by lightly touching an arm or a hand, or even a shoulder. I’ve seen people light right up time and time again with a friendly greeting and a soft touch. There are many articles written about the power of touch.

Equipment can be a barrier to hugging a loved one

The biggest problem is overcoming the barrier of the wheelchair or the hospital style bed. It’s very challenging to get down to wheelchair level to put an arm around my mother. This is where I’m thankful for some athleticism and the ability to crouch down next to her for long periods of time.  I’ve had people comment that if they got down that low they would never get up. I don’t take that for granted and it’s actually a motivation to continue to do lunges and squats as part of my workout routine. Otherwise I wouldn’t be able to ever hug my mother. That wouldn’t be acceptable. Just today the unit manager commented on my mother’s joyful glow while I had my arm wrapped around her. It’s the power of touch and the power of communicating my love for her in a way that she feels and understands.

I would encourage anyone to work at finding that human connection with their loved one with Alzheimer’s. There is a very good chance that the power of touch can be the catalyst to that loving connection.