Wine – Fun for a Dementia Patient

Every once in a while my mother reminds me that she is not only a late stage Alzheimer’s patient. She is an adult woman who still has the capacity to enjoy elements of living. One Friday night I saw a look of contentment on her face. Her expression simply conveyed a satisfaction that she was present and thoroughly enjoying the moment. Mom was enjoying herself. It surprised me perhaps because I’m more alert to expressions of pain or discomfort. This experience reminds me never to overlook something small that could be fun for a dementia patient.

The most interesting discovery has been about my mother enjoying her wine on Friday night. She is living in a lovely facility and memory unit that encourages family to dine with the residents one night per week. The food is wonderful and it’s a marvelous opportunity to eat dinner with my mother. The first couple of times that I had dinner with her, I elected not to serve my mother any wine. For some reason I thought it may not be good for her or that it may conflict with medications. But I discovered this night that I was denying my mother a simple pleasure. She always did enjoy her red wine.

I decided to put the small cup of wine in her hand and help raise it to her lips. She holds small hand-sized cups easily and drinks by herself once she has a grasp of the cup. I was a bit stunned as I just watched her. She took a sip and instead of putting it down as she normally does, she looked at it and took another sip. She appeared to be savoring it and I detected this very satisfied look on her face. I was enjoying this as much as she was. I just sat back and watched her and started to chuckle as I noticed she was holding the cup very delicately now with her pinky raised. Mom never really acknowledged me sitting there but she was in her own world enjoying her glass of wine.

Now I make sure that she gets her wine every Friday night. It’s important to find the little pleasures that my mother can enjoy and, at least for now, a simple glass of wine can be fun for a dementia patient.